Most folks envision a time portal as something futuristic, flashy, and high tech. But most folks haven't visited Silverville, where anything is possible. Might have something to do with all the intersecting ley lines over the locale, or with the magical fungus growing inside one humble little building -- or both.
In this scene, local entrepreneur Buford Price and his perky, quirky co-workers are already trying to cash in on the time portal. Buford & Co. call themselves KA CATCHERS (Egyptian mysticism, etc., but that's more back story than you need for now), and they know the machine transports only a traveler's consciousness to any desired place and time. But there's a catch: The traveler has to settle for temporarily possessing a random body at the destination.
In this excerpt, our fave new character, April Schauers, and her co-worker, Micah Musil, are in for more than one surprise.
Please read on!
* * *
April followed Micah and the foreigner who called himself "Mr. Smith" as far as the
flashy time portal façade hiding the outhouse. Along the way, the Ka Catcher
team stressed the importance of focusing on the time and place once inside The
Time Portal.
“It’s sort of like what Dorothy did when she
clicked her heels together three times,” Micah said. “’There’s no place like
home. There’s no place like home.’ And that’s where she ended up.”
“What?” Mr. Smith asked. “Who is this Dorothy?”
“Never mind,” April said. “You just think about
southern Turkey and goat herding twelve-thousand years ago.”
Micah unlocked the façade door, and he and Mr.
Smith entered.
“Bon voyage, Mr. Smith,” April called out. “Have
a good trip.”
She waited outside but heard him gasp and say, “Is
this some sort of joke?” Yep, Micah must be leading him into the outhouse.
After a few minutes, Micah joined April.
“He’s on his way,” he told her.
“How long before I can go on my Day Trip?” She’d
decided her destination would be Tintagel Castle in fifth-century Cornwall,
England. She didn’t expect to find the Round Table or Holy Grail, but she
wanted to see if there really was a King Arthur and Merlin.
“Beats me. Now’s as good a time as any, I guess.”
They entered through the façade, but Micah
stopped at the outhouse door. “You’re on your own from here.”
April took a deep breath and approached the door.
“Wait!” Micah reached out, touching her arm.
“Maybe you should take out your contacts first. Gonna be in there for a while.”
She popped out the designer star lenses, placed
them in a small carrying case, and dropped it in her pocket.
Giving him a hug, she stepped inside the
outhouse.
* * *
April barely had time to notice Mr. Smith slumped
against the inner outhouse wall, or the sign on the inside door, reading, “This Way Out,”
before she found herself curled up next to a large, craggy rock on a grassy hill.
The first sound she heard was the nearby bleating
of goats.
Still a little disoriented, she stood and turned
in circles for signs of a castle. But as far as she could see there was nothing
but rolling hills dotted with grazing goats. She trotted up a knoll to get a
better of idea of how close she was to the coast of the Celtic Sea.
No water in sight.
“Shit!”
She looked down at her clothing. Clearly a man’s,
but instead of the fifth-century linen or woolen garb she expected, her
clothing more resembled a shift dress of crude animal skins. This didn’t look
like Arthur’s Cornwall, or even Dorothy’s Kansas.
Her destination looked a lot more like southern
Turkey twelve-thousand years ago.
But if that were so, where was Mr. Smith?
From her knoll, she saw a disturbance in the
herd. All the animals moved away from one particular goat, which looked at her
and started bleating.
“Uh-oh.”
The unpopular goat started up the knoll, running
toward her. At the moment it rounded a craggy outcropping, a large spotted
leopard leaped from one of the rocks and took down the goat with a single
swipe. She watched in horror as the cat settled over the carcass to devour its
prey.
* * *
Micah sat in a folding chair situated just
outside the outhouse. He unscrewed his thermos and took a swig of coffee to
wash down the donut. He figured this part of his job would be the most boring.
The waiting. At least he’d remembered to bring a book.
He still worried about two people taking Day
Trips at the same time. Initially, Buford had proposed they offer
multiple-party trips, but he and April had talked him out of it. They certainly
hadn’t worked through the consequences, and here they’d tried it on the spur of
the moment anyway. He thought back to April’s argument about her own trip. What could go wrong?
Chances were, nothing, but it still made him uncomfortable.
He sure wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to
her. Yeah, she was bossy, but easier to talk to than prim little Puritan Sarah
when he'd time-traveled to 17th-Century New England. April had even stood up
for him when Buford had tried to short them on pay. Sarah hadn’t defended him
when her father marched him to the stocks. And April sure looked great in that
Cleopatra outfit – a real improvement over a gray Puritan dress and bonnet.
April was beautiful, confident, clever – and she
lived in the twenty-first century. Of course, she wore lizard lenses and lied
for effect. He’d never met anybody so eccentric, but that made her all the more
interesting. And despite their rocky introduction, they’d become
comrades-in-arms against a world created by Buford Price. Micah even found
himself imagining the two of them as a couple.
He laughed out loud. No girls ever liked spending
time with him. Still, was it possible she might one day see more in him than
just a coworker? Only one way to find out: He’d take the plunge, invite her to
a movie or out to coffee.
Pushing into the chair to find a more comfortable
position, he leaned back and daydreamed about a future with someone as
complicated as April.
An hour later, the outhouse door blew open and
the woman of his dreams stumbled out.
“Micah!” she gasped.
“That was quick.” He moved over to help steady
her. “How come you’re back so soon?”
Breathing hard, she rasped, “Mr. Smith …”
“He back already, too?” He looked toward the
outhouse.
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Mr. Smith
isn’t coming back.”
* * *
Street date for The Magicke Outhouse is late this year.
Your novel sounds charming, Kym. That's for sharing an excerpt. I've pinned this so my family can find your book. Best!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Joylene, for the interest, and for stopping by. Much appreciated.
ReplyDeleteWe wrote the first two books in the series with an adult audience in mind. But each received YA nominations. Go figure -- guess our humor must be more juvenile than we realized! :)
For this third book, we embraced that audience while still trying to write for adults as well.
Fingers crossed.
Enjoyed this little appetizer, Kym. Looking forward to the release. Exciting!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Vie. Hope you enjoy the whole book.
DeleteEnjoyed this little appetizer, Kym. Looking forward to the release. Exciting!!
ReplyDeletethat was a fun trip! love the concept! congrats!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tara, for stopping by.
ReplyDeleteWe got really excited when we first came up with the idea for this book -- time travel for a day, but with a random "host" body.
Then we quickly realized we were drifting too close to the premise of that old TV series, Quantum Leap. So we altered the "rules" and decided time travel would only be the fun-and-games premise that launches the story but not the mail plot. (That's more about how what goes wrong complicates the present.)
And, of course, hopefully much funnier than the QL theme.